He is not here; He has risen!

Then Jesus came to them and said, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit,and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age." Matthew 28:18-20

What a blessed few days for our family and our church, when we stop to meditate on the profound grace we are offered through the death and resurrection of Jesus.


The month of April carries with it a lot of joy and sadness for me, especially this year. This is the month my son turns two, growing so quickly he delights me with his thoughts and all the things he is learning, his smile and his laugh; the way he looks like me and acts like his father.


April is the month I lost my daughter, Ally, and the month I knew I would lose my father sooner rather than later. The grief remains a deep channel in my heart, sometimes flowing peacefully, bubbling softly in the background—and other times threatening to spill over the banks and sweep me away.


I know that despite my pain and my grief this year—despite anything that has happened, or could happen in the future—God has been so faithful to me. Years after the fact, I can see how God was working in my life at certain times, even when I was walking away from Him.

We all have days/months/years/decades when our faith is weak or wavering. We all have days we want to throw up our hands and sit on the couch and check out.

And sometimes we do.

I think the real danger for me at this point in my life is that I spend a lot of time planning the future and not enough time in the present.

This Easter my goal is to spend more time enjoying the gifts God has blessed me with.

Thankfully, I have a sweet, insistent two year old boy here to remind me that the present is:

“NOW! MOMMY!”

Heavy Heart

"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing."
~Edmund Burke

I have a moral dilemma. I don't even know if it is technically a moral dilemma but it feels like one. I have a relative with two children. One has special needs and is very hard to handle, and the other has special needs emotionally only because of the way he has been raised, in a very unstable environment.

Background: Relative got married, had two kids in two years. Has never had a job really, and his wife left him when the kids were like 2 & 3. Fast forward...Relative got remarried to someone who has a lot of kids all of whom are in juvie or jail. Now they are in the process of getting divorced. I might also add that Relative is an alcoholic who is also possibly (and likely) on drugs. This person is verbally and mentally abusive to kid #1 (not the special needs kid).

All of these things have come to a head in the last few weeks and the police have been called several times as well as social services (not by me though). So I am wondering...what do you do? We don't have the resources to take in one kid, let alone two and one with disabilities. But they don't belong with this relative any more so how do we get social services to see that before something terrible happens to them? Oh, and now Relative is 'on the run' because he thinks everyone is trying to take his kids away from him (which is true but he is way paranoid and I'm pretty sure that's from the drugs).

The one kid's life is being ruined and I don't know how to help him. He could be a good and productive member of society if just given the chance to live in a normal environment (I believe). I feel like the poor kid is falling through the cracks.
My heart is heavy today.