Monday, August 3, 2009

The laundry fairy (and other suburban legends)


Once at a party my husband, talking about how the chores are divvied up at our house said,
"I just throw my dirty clothes downstairs and they magically reappear clean and in my closet."

Yeah, that's how it happens.

I think the laundry fairy is a tiny but incredibly strong flying fairy that emerges from the same Magical Maytagland where all the socks disappear. I like to imagine that in addition to the fairy in magical Maytagland there are also the evil sock-stealers that look much like the little gnome in my yard (only tiny) and I have at some point broken the 3 important rules with the little sock stealers: they must never see sunlight, must not ever touch water, and must not be fed after midnight (because of course they are like little mogwai). And they live with the laundry fairy in a beautiful lavender dryer-sheet scented area somewhere in the dryer vent tube.

I need more sleep. Lots more. Last night I think Holden had night terrors and I was dreaming of terrorists (for realz) they were trying to kill my family while we were at a church event by bombing us.

I can't lie, I would like to take a muscle relaxant and go to sleep right. now.

If you need me you can usually find me either knee deep in laundry or holed up in my room on the laptop. And someday I'm afraid that the little gnome-mogwai-terrorists will finally succeed in their plot to steal my peace of mind one sock at a time...





(And no, I did not already take a muscle relaxant.)

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